My breakfast with Phasma

I woke up this morning with a billion things going through my head, mostly things I’m wanting to get done, and also this weird question that I’ll probably blog about sometime (Top 5 List: people you would like to meet with over coffee). Once I’m up, I drop a few kibbles down for the cat, though we both know she’s just going to nibble then walk away, then I reach for a new box of Cheerios, rip open the top and extract the bag.

* Lifehack of the Day: always take the bag out of the box and throw the box away. Far easier to deal with later.

When I extract bag out, there’s a surprise—another little plastic packet inside my box! And inside that packet is what looks like a spoon. I glance at the box, where I determine that this packet looks like a spoon because that’s what it is.

AND IT’S NOT JUST ANY SPOON

It’s a Star Wars spoon: a little piece of merchandising, right there on my breakfast counter. Even better, you can imagine my delight to learn that this is a color-changing spoon! (* enlarged to show detail*)

This is when, for the first time, I notice there’s a picture of Rey on my cereal box, complete with light saber and a fierce pose—let’s ignore the “made with real honey” printed over her head, with the words REAL HONEY in bold white print that pops as it hangs over her head. Seeing as this is a cereal box, I’m sure I’m just reading too much into that.

Pressing on, I flip to the back and find that the spoon comes in six versions: BB8, Captain Phasma, Chewbacca, R2D2, Kylo Ren, and, of course, Rey. (*collect all six!*) I have to report that the box’s image of the Kylo spoon, however, does not look particularly Renish, to my eyes. I think he’s wearing his helmet, so maybe that’s it. Anyway, mine turns out to be Captain Phasma. Cool.

Reading further, I find that “color magically appears when spoon is dipped in cold milk!” Yes, it says it right there on the box! This is awesome, eh? Totally awesome!

YOU KNOW WHERE THIS IS GOING, RIGHT?

I’ve got to see how this works, I’m thinking as I pour my milk straight from the fridge onto my delicious Cheerios. I wanna see colors!

By now I realize everyone else is going to be interested, too. So I take a second to snap a picture, hoping my delay doesn’t let the milk warm too much:

Then I plunge my Phasma into the milk.

I admit the feel of the plastic isn’t particularly appetizing, and I’m imaging molecules of plastic sliding past my teeth and into my gullet, but I’m on a mission and if you’ve seen the film you know that when the battle is on sacrifices must be made. We will also bypass the question of what Gwendoline Christie might feel about the idea of being a spoon–down that path lies madness, I think. Amid all these issues and uncertainties, Phasma does her job and for my part I ignore she’s on the wrong side of history as she lifts Cheerios to my mouth,

A couple bites later, I clean her up a bit, and take a breathless look…and…my goodness, but it is magical!


CONCLUSIONS & LESSONS LEARNED

Like most experiments, I think you can take any one of several messages from these events. You could decide it’s a fluke, or that my view of magical is warped. Or you could create a great conspiracy theory to explain why Finn and Poe and Rose didn’t get their images on spoons. For me, though, the lesson is both clear and obvious. Since you are also of sane mind, I’m sure that once you really think about it, you’ll come to the same conclusion as I have:

The Force is with my milk.

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